Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Adieu


You have always created that persona, the strict, proud and "ma-angas" character that some may have flinched but I was able to appreciate it.

You may not know it or maybe you have, (counting the fact that you can always figure me out) it was a joy to call you brother and to be treated as the same.

You've always been secretive, from your picture, YM account, location, DM relays and even your mobile number.  I know you have your reasons and I understand them.

The YM sessions were always fun and instructing especially with you-know-who. That moment on, I was really sure that you're a treasure and didn't restrict myself of telling you that.  I was glad to know you fancied the remark.

The teasing part always got me and it was fun making that #issue on the timeline.  Same goes with #TMI.

But what I cherished more is when you always ask "What's for dinner?" or asking how to make a specific dish.  From the ingredients to the cooking instructions even with the alternatives.  Even your joke about taking  up culinary.

Aside from those things, you've always been a puzzle I was trying to piece together but I didn't know I would be able to complete it with a shocking revelation.

Indeed, He moves in mysterious ways.  I've known that for quite sometime now but the gloomy shadow of losing and the grief that comes with it is just too real.

My whole afternoon a moment ago felt like I was floating. I was trying to mask the vulnerable me in front of everyone.  I even decided to dismiss an overseas call prematurely just to avoid myself from bursting down to tears.

But now, it's all sinking in. Especially at around this time when all of us would be online and would discuss anything on the timeline.

It's like a smack in the face that no matter how we mention you or send you DMs, there won't be anyone answering back.


I didn't just lost a friend... I lost a brother.


Rest well. You know you are loved and you will always be remembered by your otōto.




p.s.
You said you've always fancied barquillos and the last SMS conversation we had was regarding the custard filling for Brazo de Mercedes.  I guess from now on, I'll always remember you when I encounter the former and bake the latter.